A smelly business idea that is not to be poo
I USUALLY skip the ads on YouTube after the mandatory five seconds but yesterday I actually went in for a second viewing.
The advert was for a product called Poo Pourri. Now, I write the following keeping in mind that some of you may be having your lunch. I’ll try to be as d cheap michael kors elicate as I can with this subject.
The advert is cringeingly hard to watch a posh lady in a dress, sitting on a toilet with a glass of champers, while describin cheap michael kors g her bowel habits in pretty graphic detail.
Secondly, it’s aimed squarely at females and, not to be too “am I right ladies?”, in my experience, men are the ones who should be using this product.
However, once I got over my initial shock and indignance, it brought back some funny memories.
The lengths most females go to preten cheap michael kors d they don’t “take care of business” are quite extraordinary.
I thought about the detrimental effect this phobia has had on past relationships of mine and one experience sticks out in my mind.
An ex of mine once whisked me away on an impromptu trip to New York.
We were still very much in the honeymoon phase and it was our first trip away together. It should have been exciting and romantic but when we arrived, to my utter horror, the toilet in our hotel room was separate from the rest of the bathroom. The old ruse of “having a shower” was scuppered.
My focus was now solely on how I was going to “take care of business” if “business” should rear its ugly head.
So I spent most of the time trying to find ways of getting him out of the room. I’d send him on wild goose chases to the 7/11 or suggest he hit the hotel gym. He thought I was a demanding piece of work and developed some body image issues to boot.
On other occasions, I’d attempt to use the hotel lobby toilets.
“I’ll just wait out here,” he’d say.
“No, really why don’t you just go for a wander,” I’d reply beads of sweat forming on my temple.
“No, no I’ll just wait out here on you.”
I’d draw him a dirty look before reluctantly entering the ladies.
I’d try to “take care of business” but just the knowledge of him waiting outside made it impossible and to make matters worse, there was always another woman in the next cubicle.
Looking back it was clear they were in the same predicament as me.
Now neither of us could “go” because women being women, ridiculous creatures that we are, can’t “take care of business cheap michael kors ” in the same vicinity of our own kind either.
You’d think there would be a sense of solidarity but no, it’d be a Mexican standoff and I’d lose every time. There was one occasion when I thought I’d triumphed.
I was delighted my persistence had paid off.
She left the cubicle, the tap sounded, followed by a hand dryer and just as I awaited for the heavenly sound of the door swinging shut, I heard instead a make up bag being unzipped. She’d pulled the old “pretending to do her make up so I’d have to leave” trick.
I have plenty of stories like this and I’m not even an extreme example.
I have friends who take Imodium when they go away for the weekend with their boyfriends.
I swear, a particular friend of mine would have a backstreet colostomy bag fitted just to avoid such situations. As vile as the Poo Pourri advert is, they know they have tapped into the most lucrative market of all insane women.